Why I Will Not Pursue A Career In Medicine

For those of you who know me, you are more than likely aware of the fact that I'm not sure about what I want to do with my life as far as careers go. I'm one of the many young adult (or old children, depending on how you look at it) that are going through the proverbial search for oneself and the path in life that will ultimately lead to some sort of meaning and fulfilment. Unfortunately, I have yet to see the light and am still in limbo as to where I would like to focus my efforts and energy. However, I do know what I don't want to do. So, although I don't know what I want to do, I'm steadily whittling the list down through a process of elimination.


My mother is a doctor and owns/operates her own medical clinic. I've been very lucky to be able to see firsthand what it takes to become and maintain a career as a medical doctor. Being a foreign medical graduate--she was already a practicing physician in the Philippines before my family decided to move to the United States--my mother took a different route than one that I would take, were I to go through medical school. However, I would still have to go through the same headaches and troubles that she puts up with in her practice. I also question the dedication I would be able to put in for a career in medicine. I couldn't see going through incredible amounts of school and training for something that I did not have a passion for. Every so often, something happens that makes me re-examine the possibility of following in my mother's footsteps and I go through the process of wondering if maybe this is my calling. I do have a deep appreciation for what (most) doctors do. To dedicate ones life to the health and well-being of others is as honorable and admirable as anything a person can choose to do with their time in this life. And even if it means putting your brain into a blender and going through rigorous schooling and subsequent training, and working yourself to exhaustion day in and day out, it all seems worth it when you think of all the lives you can truly touch and change for the better.


And right as I felt like I reached an epiphany, my mother's medical assistant walked into the room.

"Doctor, Mr. Lopez is here for an anus check."



And in a flash of light, the first epiphany was stomped to death by a second epiphany.


Oh yeah. That's why I decided not to become a doctor. Because if I ever heard someone say that to me, my reply would most definitely be, "Fuck that. Mr. Lopez can check his own anus. Here, he can even borrow my equipment. It's almost lunchtime, are you crazy? Tell him to take himself and his anus to another doctor. And while you're at it, put up a sign in the lobby that says that I reserve the right to refuse services that include checking gross shit. Thanks. Hold my calls, I'm off to lunch."